Author Apra Kuchhal urges greater acceptance and sensitivity towards transgender people while discussing Aryan Pasha’s story in Chümoukedima
DIMAPUR — Acceptance begins with acknowledging that transgender people and their experiences exist, author Apra Kuchhal said during a literary conversation in Chümoukedima on September 28 night, urging parents and teachers to encourage greater sensitivity among children.
Kuchhal, author of Aryan Pasha: The Untold Story of India’s First Transgender Bodybuilding Champion, was in conversation with literary enthusiast and proprietor of The White Owl book lounge, Viketuno Rio, at The Write Circle, a literary initiative of the Prabha Khaitan Foundation in association with Oil India Limited, held at Zone Niathu by The Park.
Much of the discussion centred on Pasha’s journey, but Kuchhal said the story was not simply about being transgender or becoming a bodybuilder. For her, it was a story of courage, determination and resilience, and ultimately of a person navigating life with conviction.
“Acceptance is the first step. Accept that such people exist, that such transitions are taking place, that such courageous people are all around us. Don’t hush-hush or try hiding it under the carpet,” she said in response to a question on the conversations that should begin in Nagaland.
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Kuchhal, who described herself as a “reporter, not an editor”, said she had not set out to write Pasha’s biography when they first met.
“Stories choose you, you don’t choose a story. This story chose me,” she shared, recalling how the encounter eventually led her to document Pasha’s life.
According to the author, writing a biography required enormous trust, crediting Pasha for opening up his life to her. At one point, she recalled, the emotional weight of the story led her to stop writing because she felt she could never fully step into his shoes.
Kuchhal said she eventually returned to the role of a documentarian, focusing on recording Pasha’s experiences rather than making the story sensational.
One of the aspects of the book that moved her most, she said, was Pasha’s relationship with his stepmother—a relationship she felt challenged the stereotype that stepmothers are necessarily unkind or hostile.
According to Kuchhal, Pasha’s parents initially struggled to understand his identity, with his father believing it could be a passing phase. But Pasha’s certainty about who he was eventually helped his family understand and support him.
She recalled that Pasha had identified himself as a boy from childhood, including refusing to wear skirts as part of his school uniform. His father and stepmother eventually stood by him, she said.
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“He was absolutely sure of what he wished to be,” Kuchhal said.
The conversation also turned to faith, prejudice, parenting and the influence of social media. Asked about the growing discussion around gender identity and sexuality online, Kuchhal questioned the tendency to treat social media as a primary source of education.
She urged readers to approach information with greater scrutiny and to rely on books and research alongside digital platforms.
The interactive session also brought questions about how such conversations could take place in a conservative society such as Nagaland. Kuchhal responded that she was not in a position to speak definitively about the state on her first visit, but stressed acceptance and sensitivity.
In her observation, Rio said that people could hold their own convictions while still listening to and respecting another person’s experience.
“We all come with our own convictions and beliefs, we don’t have to set those aside, but such evenings ask us a simple question, to listen to a human story,” she said.
Kuchhal said she hoped readers would not approach Pasha’s biography solely as a transgender story, but as the account of a person who showed courage and determination in pursuing the life he wanted.
The discussion was attended by literary enthusiasts and concluded with an interaction between the author and audience, followed by a book-signing session.
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