Traffic Jams in Nagaland – A Travellers Guide

Jun 19, 2019

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By Dr. Sedevi Angami During the last 19 and half years of my life, I have been clearing traffic jams along the Kohima - Dimapur highway and within both the cities. Almost every time I travel in between these two cities, I look forward to these traffic jams so that I can add one more notch on my forearm tattoo. The sense of accomplishment when the jam clears and vehicles start to move is unique and needs to be experienced. With the recent widening of the roads, I am in danger of losing this hobby and end up as an educated unemployed youth at age 52. This article is aimed at training the next generation of amateur traffic controllers. Top Reasons for traffic jams

A driver going down the opposite direction on a one way street.
A novice driver who is unable to decide which way to turn in the middle of the road. With all due respect, this seems to happen more often with the fairer sex. I wonder why.
An angry driver who leaves his vehicle in the middle of the road till he settles the issue with the person who crossed him/ banged his car.
A vehicle breakdown on an uphill road – usually an overloaded truck or pickup vehicle.
A big truck or bus which does not have an efficient handy man or one who is too lazy to get down on the mud and tell him that there is enough space to go through without scraping the side mirror of the neighbouring vehicle.
The usual army convoy or the Friends of the hill people who decide to take a break in the middle of a narrow stretch to attend to nature’s call and contribute their precious fertilizer to the economy of our state.
Two drivers who come face to face on a narrow stretch, both refusing to back out since it would mean a loss of honour.
Two drivers who come face to face on a narrow stretch and do not know how to proceed. Both waiting to see who will reverse first while keeping their headlamps on (which means – I am coming through first – you wait).
Landslides
A tree which has fallen on the road.
A very naive driver who thinks he can outsmart the long line of vehicles by overtaking them when they are standing still for the line to move, thereby blocking the vehicles from the opposite side. Generally, he is driving a brand new SUV and takes courage from the preceding equally naive driver who leads the charge with the same intent in mind.
The usual VIP convoy which is in a great hurry to overtake all the others to attend to a matter of great urgency of national importance. Followed by the 4-5 incidental other vehicles who suddenly decide to tag along, blowing their horns with equal vigour and hoping to fool the cops to think that they are part of the same convoy.
Drivers who refuse to allow another vehicle to enter their lane at road transections, thereby forcing him to keep his vehicle at an awkward tangential angle and blocking all opposite direction vehicles.

Over the years, I have found some methods very effective in clearing the jams in places where there are no traffic policemen to do the job – like highways at night or bypasses. If you find that the vehicles in front of you are not moving for more than 5 minutes, get out of your vehicle and move forward to the place where there is a bottleneck. If you do not get out of your vehicle, you are likely to be stranded for the next few hours. Usually, you will find one of the above mentioned reasons causing the block. It helps to take vocal lessons from music teachers for this particularly special role. I would welcome your experiences, suggestions and techniques for clearing traffic jams. This will help me to develop this article into a manual to be given to the next generation of amateur traffic controllers who can say - When you go home, tell them that for their tomorrow we gave our today.

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Survey the scene like a general first (Remember “The Art of war” by Sun Tzu) and get the big picture.
Stop the ongoing vehicles from moving any further. Ask a fellow bystander to stop any more vehicles from clogging their side of the road.
Reorganize the vehicles by gently asking in your best polite Nagamese to move a few inches or feet to give more space for the truck to pass through. You may need to ask several vehicles to do this one by one. In my experience, on an average it takes about 5 vehicles to comply to reach a steady state level of meaningful passage.
Tell the truck driver to trust you and direct him to move ahead (generally they are fearful of moving ahead presuming that they might fall into the drain) till he is clear.
Mobilize one or two more travellers to keep some of the vehicles from coming forward and making things worse till you have sorted out the stuck truck. Nothing like having a team to sort out issues.

Sometimes, you may need to be very firm with certain drivers and urge them to move back so that the ones in front can find their way forward especially since you do not wear an olive green uniform that can strike fear into errant drivers. Most male chauvinist drivers hate reversing their vehicles since it is like losing face in front of the enemy. After all, how can I face my wife after this incident?
Occasionally you may need to ask several vehicles to move a few feet to one side or enter into a space to provide just that needed amount to let one line of traffic to pass through.
When a traffic jam occurs, usually there are two jams. One at the bottleneck and the second one further down. Traffic policemen and traffic lights are able to sort out the traffic by letting vehicles pass at equal intervals of time. If one line passes for too long, the other line will acquire a huge jam downstream since that line will become very long. Very soon, that line will block the first line downstream. In order to avoid this from happening, you might need to block one line and let the other line pass through. This is awkward when you do not have a uniform and one may wonder on whose authority you are stopping the line from moving. On several occasions when I stopped a line of vehicles from moving, things have generally worked out OK and I have remained unscathed.

If you find the instructions in ‘number 5’ complicated, try doing it as a chorus like our Praise and Worship leaders who repeat the song about 5 - 10 times till we finally get it.
Always keep adequate space between you and the vehicle in front so that in case the jam is impossible to clear, you can always turn back and take a detour escape route and leave the jam for other more capable people to sort out. Best of luck guys. See you on the other side.
If nothing works, do not lose heart. One day, you will reach your destination. I have yet to see anybody along the Kohima - Dimapur Highway ever die of starvation nor have I seen skeletons of travellers on the road. Traffic jams have actually improved the economy by creating a new breed of food entrepreneurs – In fact it has improved interstate relations by the mushrooming of Manipuri Iromba and Ooti hotels which are getting more popular by the day. Between the Lotha, Bihari and Manipuri hotels, I think the latter may have an edge.
Use the time in traffic jams to pray for the roads and people of Nagaland. Praying is infinitely better than cursing. You will find that it is time well spent rather than wasted time.

Whenever you go from Kohima to Dimapur, always use shoes and not chappals (for the diehard Gandhian Naga). Most of the times, you will need to walk through a lot of mud.
Always carry a torch with new batteries. This is useful since you might need to walk at least half a kilometre at night till you reach the bottleneck. You will need the torch (Father’s day gift is ideal) to show the drivers where to back up or enter into a possible space on the road to give way to others. A mobile phone torch is insufficient.
Always take an umbrella (Another Father’s day gift) along since you may need to walk in the rain for some time.
For long journeys in Nagaland, always carry a shovel and spade to dig your way out of small landslides. Carry a Dao to cut the branches of the tree which falls in front of you and blocks the road. Some of the sports stores now have two in one convertible shovel cum spades. Designer ware but effective. (I wish the ladies would give us this next Father’s day – you get these cheap these days with great discounts on Amazon). A chain saw might be an overkill.
Take a rope along with you so that if the tree is quite heavy, you can tie it and pull it away with some additional travellers who are bound to be stuck with you. Make sure the rope is long enough and very strong since you might need to use it to pull out a Tata Sumo in front of you which has slipped into the ditch.
Enough water to drink (Again the father’s day flask gift is ideal) since you are likely to be stranded for about 2 hours or more at times. Dried wild apples or gooseberries can come in handy.

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