Live Until You Die (World Hospice and Palliative Care Day)

“You matter because you are you, and you matter to the end of your life. We will do all we can not only to help you die peacefully, but also to live until you die.”

World Hospice and Palliative Care Day is celebrated today (Oct. 11). It focuses on to embrace each moment, pursue your dreams, and live authentically, rather than waiting for a future moment to truly begin living. It's about embodying the principles of a well-lived life, finding courage in self-expression, and knowing that your presence has inherent value, as captured by the words of palliative care pioneer Dame Cicely Saunders, who stated, "You matter because you are you, and you matter to the end of your life. We will do all we can not only to help you die peacefully, but also to live until you die". It is an affirmation of a full and engaged life, emphasising the importance of experiencing and enjoying life to its absolute fullest from birth to death, rather than living in fear or regret. It also highlights the natural process of life and death, suggesting that life is to be lived and experienced completely, without rushing or trying to avoid the inevitable end. To live before you die, embrace experiences by pursuing passions, traveling, and strengthening relationships, and find inner peace by focusing on your core values and making a positive impact. Cultivate a proactive approach to your well-being, express your emotions, seek self-care, and remember the perspective that a finite life brings to help you prioritise what truly matters, aligning your actions with your deepest convictions.

When you not only know but also feel that you are here in this world just for a limited period then such awareness transforms your life in many ways. It makes you a better person as it ignites positive emotions and subdues negative ones. It makes you a wiser person as it helps you discriminate between what is important and what is superficial. It creates a sense of urgency to live and forces you to take action for the things which truly matter to you. It brings out your hidden talents and potential. It inspires you to make the best use of your time and this life.

Live in Abundance: Abundance is a state of mind and a set of beliefs. It’s a way of looking at the world, others, and yourself. It is deciding to believe that the universe will provide if you keep your end of the contract by believing it’s possible. You can be wealthy and lonely at the same time. You can be wealthy while suffering from poor health. You can be financially wealthy while also being unhappy. You can be the wealthiest person on the planet and still not feel abundant. It is a journey to realise that I have an abundant life. When looking at the areas of your life where you believe you have abundance, you see that you are loved, you have a large friend group, and there is joy and happiness in the things you do and the people you share your life with. You have compassion for others, you have fun, and you have confidence in your own abilities. It means to live life to its fullest, embracing its imperfections, and finding purpose and joy in each difficulties. It involves accepting your own mortality, confronting fears, pursuing passions, and practicing self-care to live a healthy, conscious, and meaningful existence.

Psychologists believe that people die when they want to die! This may sound strange but the fact is that in a sizable number of cases we realise that this is true. There is a process of death and it is a living process in the sense that it is a developmental crisis. It is said to be a personal experience for as long as we continue to live we may not quite understand what it is to die and in this sense it is personal for the person who dies. It is not only a personal experience but also the first and last experience for we do not die twice but only once! Even in the case of resuscitation, the brain has not been dead which means to say that the person in actuality did not die. There is a dying process of the organism and there is a dying process of a person and they need not go hand in hand. Therefore, the person may die later than the death of the organism.

It is true that death may occur at any age. Elderly people seem more of its imminence and less afraid than younger ones. It is also found that some of the elderly people view death as an acceptable alternative to a life that might have become meaningless. Researchers point out that the dying persons are willing to talk about their impending death and they seem to be needing and welcoming such a discussion. In fact, they are thankful that they learned about their death. In practice, we want to postpone telling the person about his death. Perhaps we are not comfortable with the event of death which prevents us from communicating to the dying person about his death.

Conclusion: Having seen what it is to “Live until you die”, let us turn our attention to what to do as counsellors to the dying person while he or she is in the dying process. We need to pay attention to the quality of life of the patient by letting him or her maintain security, self-confidence, and dignity. For those who are at the terminal stage of their illness, physical comfort is a great necessity. Through adequate medical assistance, care should be taken to give him or her maximum physical comfort. Through the use of pain killers the patient’s physical pain can be alleviated. The patient can also be taught if he or she is in a position to learn, to self-hypnotize and do some relaxation exercises depending upon his or her physical condition and mental state. Above all, love and affection should surround the patient more than anything else. Counselling the dying is the last one of the best services the counsellor can render to a dying person. With the ‘therapeutic thereness’ the counsellor helps the patient to die with dignity, courage and serenity. The dying person realises that he or she has a trustworthy, knowledgeable and able friend who accompanies him or her in the last journey. Perhaps, nothing will be more rewarding for the counsellor than the thought that he has been facilitative to a dying person (at his death bed) to live one’s life fully till the end or to live until you live.

Rev. Fr. C. Joseph,

Counsellor,

St. Joseph’s College (Autonomous),

Jakhama, Kohima-Nagaland.